“Thoughts Become Things… Choose The Good Ones!” ― Mike Dooley
Looks like every book, journal, magazine, psychiatrist and spiritual gurus talk about one thing: being positive, think positive – all the time. I get charged up reading them, wohoo! I am the wonder girl; will save earth from negative emotions! Not only this euphoria stays within me but I spread it around like flu. I go on counseling friends, telling them to ask their mind and body to think good, feel good. This lasts for a week and then bam! There goes my positivity flying away in far-far-away land! Reality paints an entirely different picture with a different brush every time. And I am back to square one where doubts, negativity, anger, frustration all sets in. Happens to you too? Is positivity really attainable by us- the less enlightened souls? *winks*
Life is no easy ride, a rollercoaster is still manageable. How do I go on keeping that calm face with positivity reflecting even from eyes all throughout the ride? I may start with a smile but will scream my lungs out, feel that I’m about to fall, experience a lush, get wet (yeah, it’s a water ride), voiceless, dizzy, nauseated and so on. It’s totally okay, it’s part of that ride to feel all these emotions. That’s why we are here. As Michael Newton puts it, ‘This planet is a testing ground for souls. Coping with these positive and negative elements on Earth is by design.’
Optimism or Pessimism runs in the family. We are brought up with the same set of thoughts and values as our parents hold. Although we rebel and carve our new beliefs, the basic thought pattern usually remains the same. In a heated situation, my voice goes five notches up (my dog runs away to save his ears), I get overwhelmed while talking and am at loss for words. Mind workshop switches off and its analysis lab shuts down completely. Comes from my father. Post the argument, all I am left with are self-demeaning or guilt thoughts- “I am no good at this”; “I could have stopped myself from reacting”!
Where to put positivity then? Inside us. The trouble is we keep fears, doubts, hatred, envy, anger and all negative emotions rooted inside us, wear the positivity coat over them; gets trapped into an illusion of wearing a Prada and pretend that there is no soiled shirt inside. Sadly, it doesn’t work! What’s inside you is what drives you.
Things to do
Keeping positive is not difficult. You might not find any not-heard-before revolutionary concepts here but the experience is truly mine! Try them:
from the negative emotion for a day. As the hours go by, we will start reasoning with ourselves. The whole argument starts looking futile. A good-night sleep over the self-despising thoughts makes me as fresh as a morning flower. Ah! Vanity!
If you feel you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel; nothing goes like the way you want; understand that it’s you who is subconsciously playing ‘victim’. Refer to yourself as third person and keep a check on your emotions. Does sympathy help you? Does blaming ‘fate’ help you? No! Why waste precious moments then?
all the negative emotions by flushing it out of your system. Free hidden emotions that are making you constipated. Let go of negative energies. Screaming in an empty place, fighting with the pillow, singing along with a rock band, exercising, punching bag, dancing or anything which is of your interest and tires you physically can help. You got to find your own ‘releasing pill’! Engage yourself in an entirely different activity. It may look like an escapism but works when you have a manageable conflict at hand. Well, most of them are manageable.
Forgive. You are much stronger than the one who hurt you. You don’t have to forcefully keep him in your life. Forgive yourself as any mistake can’t be bigger than the life you are missing. It had a lesson to teach you. Learn and move on!
Blesitation- That’s what I call it
Take out 10 minutes in the morning. (Don’t put a timer though.) Sit in silence on the floor. Close your eyes. See yourself being showered by the white light. It is enveloping you with calmness, peace, love and happiness. Say out loud or murmur in your heart, stressing each word: “I am blessed. I can feel a positive energy; happiness; love; peace. I am connected to the Source. I have the power to steer my life. I feel grateful. Thank you ….(lord, angel, universe, anything you believe in)!” Do this every morning.
If none of the above works and you think those negative emotions inside you are not a result of daily life chaos and there is a deep-rooted problem, go for a spiritual healer. Those trapped emotions are eating away your energy. If you have even one experience which makes you feel the same pain today as it did when it actually happened, you are imprisoned by that emotion; you need to set it free.
Energy cleansing, Past-life regression, Rebirthing breath-work, Bach flower therapy, according to the need can do wonders for you.
Boomerang? Take it easy!
Thoughts are stubborn. They keep coming back to us. There is no promise of killing 100% germs. But once we release the negative energies linked with them, there will be a room for positivity to take a seat, deep inside us where it should be. It is okay to feel them but essential to know how to get back. And then, all those negative feelings will be momentary. Within us, there will be tranquility and positivity. That’s when we can create more goodness, happiness out of this moment. That’s when we will attract series of such moments towards us.
Quoting Rhonda Byrne by taking the liberty of changing the last word, “May the joy be with us.”